Bold added. I don't know who you talked to, or what they actually said, but I have never heard anyone say such a thing. While it is true, giving people a 'hand out' instead of a 'hand up' tends to encourage laziness, that is regardless of race, it is human nature. What you espoused, sounds like something plantation owners may have said about their slaves back in 1860 America. I think many of you liberal kooks LIVE back in that era.
My definition of racism is valid, you acknowledge that. It is the belief that one race is inferior or superior to another, and such a belief can be manifest in many ways. Affirmative Action is ONE of those ways. In an ever-so-subtle legislative way, it says; We believe black people to be inferior, therefore, we are establishing a racially discriminatory law, to make black people more 'equal' to white people in the job market. It also suggests the color of skin is a valid criteria when determining who to hire. In essence, AA reinforces the very racist stereotypes and beliefs it was intended to combat.
Now, I know how you Liberal types are all about "feelings" and the emotional significance of things. Well, think about a typical African-American of average intelligence and education... They get a job through Affirmative Action... How do you think it makes them feel regarding their self-esteem? They don't have the satisfaction of knowing they were hired because of merit, or because they impressed the prospective employer, or because they were articulate and knowledgeable... nope, it's only because their skin happened to be the right pigmentation, and that's all. Does THIS tell black people they are equal to whites? Or does it merely serve as antiquated patronization, based on racist stereotypes?
We can also venture into the philosophical arena... Is one kind of racism "better" than another? Can there be "good" racism? I happen to think there is no "good" or "better" racism, it is ALL deplorable. When you discriminate against people based on their skin color, it is wrong, regardless of what color they are. Affirmative Action does just that.