The Teabagger Socialist-Free Purity Pledge!

signalmankenneth

Verified User
The Teabagger Socialist-Free Purity Pledge

I, ________________________________, do solemnly swear to uphold the principles of a socialism-free society and heretofore pledge my word that I shall strictly adhere to the following:

I will complain about the destruction of 1st Amendment Rights in this country, while I am duly being allowed to exercise my 1st Amendment Rights.

I will complain about the destruction of my 2ndAmendment Rights in this country, while I am duly being allowed to exercise my 2ndAmendment rights by legally but brazenly brandishing unconcealed firearms in public.

I will foreswear the time-honored principles of fairness, decency, and respect by screaming unintelligible platitudes regarding tyranny, Nazi-ism, and socialism at public town halls.

Also. I pledge to eliminate all government intervention in my life. I will abstain from the use of and participation in any socialist goods and services including but not limited to the following:


Social Security


Medicare/Medicaid


State Children's Health Insurance Programs (SCHIP)


Police, Fire, and Emergency Services


US Postal Service


Roads and Highways


Air Travel (regulated by the socialist FAA)


The US Railway System


Public Subways and Metro Systems


Public Bus and Lightrail Systems


Rest Areas on Highways


Sidewalks


All Government-Funded Local/State Projects (e.g., see Iowa 2009federal senate appropriations-- http://grassley.senate.gov/issues/upload/Master-Approps-73109.pdf)


Public Water and Sewer Services (goodbye socialist toilet, shower, dishwasher, kitchen sink, outdoor hose!)


Public and State Universities and Colleges


Public Primary and Secondary Schools


Sesame Street


Publicly Funded Anti-Drug Use Education for Children


Public Museums


Libraries


Public Parksand Beaches


State and National Parks


Public Zoos


Unemployment Insurance


Municipal Garbage and Recycling Services


Treatment at Any Hospital or Clinic That Ever Received Funding From Local, Stateor Federal Government (pretty much all of them)


Medical Services and Medications That Were Created or Derived From Any Government Grant or Research Funding (again, pretty much all of them)


Socialist Byproducts of Government Investment Such as Duct Tape and Velcro (Nazi-NASA Inventions)


Use of the Internets, email, and networked computers, as the DoD's ARPANET was the basis for subsequent computer networking


Foodstuffs, Meats, Produce and Crops That Were Grown With, Fed With, Raised With or That Contain Inputs From Crops Grown With Government Subsidies


Clothing Made from Crops (e.g. cotton) That Were Grown With or That Contain Inputs From Government Subsidies


If a veteran of the government-run socialist US military, I will forego my VA benefits and insist on paying for my own medical care


I will not tour socialist government buildings like the Capitol in Washington, D.C.

I pledge to never take myself, my family, or my children on a tour of the following types of socialist

locations, including but not limited to:


Smithsonian Museums such as the Air and Space Museum or Museum of American History


The socialist Washington, Lincoln, and Jefferson Monuments


The government-operated Statue of Liberty


The Grand Canyon


The socialist World War II and Vietnam Veterans Memorials


The government-run socialist-propaganda location known as Arlington National Cemetery


All other public-funded socialist sites, whether it be in my state or in Washington, DC


I will urge my Member of Congress and Senators to forego their government salary and government-provided healthcare.

I will oppose and condemn the government-funded and therefore socialist military of the United States of America.

I will boycott the products of socialist defense contractors such as GE, Lockheed-Martin, Boeing, Northrop Grumman, General Dynamics, Raytheon, Humana, FedEx, General Motors, Honeywell, and hundreds of others that are paid by our socialist government to produce goods for our socialist army.

I will protest socialist security departments such as the Pentagon, FBI, CIA, Department of Homeland Security, TSA, Department of Justice and their socialist employees.

Upon reaching eligible retirement age, I will tear up my socialist Social Security checks.

Upon reaching age 65, I will forego Medicare and pay for my own private health insurance until I die.

SWORN ON A BIBLE AND SIGNED THIS DAY OF ____________ IN THE YEAR ______________.

___________________________ ___________________________

Signed Printed Name/Town and State

4-14-offical-sign-protester-75-20090913-51.jpg
 
I'm surprised the teabagger spelled all the words on the sign correctly. Most of 'em that I saw on 9/12 were atrocious.

Say, has FatAssco signed this yet?
 
I'm surprised the teabagger spelled all the words on the sign correctly. Most of 'em that I saw on 9/12 were atrocious.

Say, has FatAssco signed this yet?

Actually, there is an error. It's spelled official, not "offical." :rolleyes:
 


Good gawd that was a lot of fat, old, and very white people. I wonder why those old geezers weren't demanding Obama take away their government Medicare?


I imagine it has something to do with the fact that private insurance companies won't cover their obesity, their diabetes, and a host of other health issues that these poor, fat southerners have associated with their diet and lethargy.
 
They only want to deny government help to people who haven't gotten it yet.
 
I don't think half these morons realize their medicare is government insurance.



in the history of protests, I think the only other protest that was literally this blindingly monochromatic white, was the KKK march on washington in 1925

kkk_1925.jpg
 
The air was redolent with the mingled scents of ignorance and liniment.
 
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