They love you for the very reasons your abuser didnt love you.
Because you are kind and understanding.
Because you are what they saw as weak.
You are what is finest and best about man.
You look at another human being and seek to understand their pain even though the pain that swirls arround your own life by NO doing of your own is so very deep.
You are compassion
you are love
You are the finest things human kind can offer.
You know that deep down in some little corner of your soul.
Im so glad that you are here.
Im so glad that even though they almost got you that they didnt succede in destroying you.
the strength in me that you see is right inside you too.
It just manivested it self in a different manner.
when you have those dark thoughts about there is something about you that deserved the abuse you think of me if it will help.
You think about the fact if YOU deserved it than that means I deserved it.
Please dont do that to me.
I did not deserve it.
neither did you.
You were strong enough to fight it and the proof is you are still here.
You are showing the world what real love looks like.
If this will help when you have those dark thoughts imagine me giving you my best drill sargent rant (wow my dad is still in there huh) about how you are the golden crop and no human being ever had the right to harm you in any way.
That child that was you who was harmed deserved to be treated like your own children.
Those children would not have deserved to be harmed any more than the child that is you deserved it.
try this little trick on for size.
Its a little bit of self parenting.
every time you have one of those bad memmories or you think a bad thought about yourself say out loud to your self if you can " I love you".
The physical act of saying and hearing it out loud could be cathartic and it helps train you brain to layer over the self derogetory thoughts with reprograming.
self doubt is more normal than peopel like you and me thought in our lives.
Everyone does it to some extent we just have some programing that tries to confirm that self doubt.
this reprograms that mechanism back to reality.
You dont even have to believe you love your self for it to work over time.
You reprogram yourself enough and you may notice you begin to believe it after some time.
