Dixie - In Memoriam
New member
I haven't read the idiot's thread of a similar name, it just made me think of this. I imagine, if Jesus was to return, the godless liberal scumbuckets would try to spin it something like this....
They would begin with a philosophical platitude, as liberalism always seem to have an abundance of them... Something like: The true test of faith is when it's challenged. The Atheist Liberals, being the smartest people in the world, knew all along that Jesus was real and would one day return, they were merely challenging our faith. If it weren't for these constant attacks on religion and God, we'd have forgotten all about Him and lost our faith. We owe the fact that mankind still believed in Jesus, to the atheist liberals who forced us all to keep remembering Him, because we're all too stupid to have remembered on our own.
A few days after Jesus returned, when he had the opportunity to do the rounds on the talk shows and whatnot, the gutless wonders would be out there twisting and manipulating every word he said, and applying it to Sarah Palin or some other convenient right-wing target. We'd have boards full of cute little pull-quotes from Jesus, taken totally out of context, and used to skewer some unsuspecting rightie. This would go on for months, until Jesus was finally forced to respond, by issuing some sort of statement to the public, to clear up the snowball of misconception.
Once word got out that Jesus didn't really 'agree' with liberals, or most of their fucked up liberal philosophies, as they have whined through the years, then the liberals would turn on Jesus, kind of like they did with Joe Lieberman. Of course, Jesus is more loved than Joe, so the response would be swift and harsh, and the liberals, forced into a corner as a result of their own arrogance, would have to hunt down Jesus and have him crucified.
Obama would probably send SEAL Team 6 to do this...
They would begin with a philosophical platitude, as liberalism always seem to have an abundance of them... Something like: The true test of faith is when it's challenged. The Atheist Liberals, being the smartest people in the world, knew all along that Jesus was real and would one day return, they were merely challenging our faith. If it weren't for these constant attacks on religion and God, we'd have forgotten all about Him and lost our faith. We owe the fact that mankind still believed in Jesus, to the atheist liberals who forced us all to keep remembering Him, because we're all too stupid to have remembered on our own.
A few days after Jesus returned, when he had the opportunity to do the rounds on the talk shows and whatnot, the gutless wonders would be out there twisting and manipulating every word he said, and applying it to Sarah Palin or some other convenient right-wing target. We'd have boards full of cute little pull-quotes from Jesus, taken totally out of context, and used to skewer some unsuspecting rightie. This would go on for months, until Jesus was finally forced to respond, by issuing some sort of statement to the public, to clear up the snowball of misconception.
Once word got out that Jesus didn't really 'agree' with liberals, or most of their fucked up liberal philosophies, as they have whined through the years, then the liberals would turn on Jesus, kind of like they did with Joe Lieberman. Of course, Jesus is more loved than Joe, so the response would be swift and harsh, and the liberals, forced into a corner as a result of their own arrogance, would have to hunt down Jesus and have him crucified.
Obama would probably send SEAL Team 6 to do this...
