It's getting more insane around here every day, I swear. Traffic, to me, has always been a bitch. Restricting my movement is stealing part of my freedom, and I consider it a personal insult as well when it is done on purpose.

I live in a small neighborhood, three streets and one way out. I work from home and routinely take trips during the day. Also routinely, some dumbass is driving slow, out of or into the neighborhood at the exact time when I need to go in-out, and I always end up behind them. Seriously dude? The speed limit is 25 and you can't drive that fast?

Yesterday I had an appointment about 45 minutes away and I let the dog out of the front door to take one more pee before I left for most of the day. A lawn service truck was stopped on the street, maneuvering to park, and was 1/2 over my driveway. No other cars on the street, so it's not like there wasn't room for him to park without blocking my driveway. I'm thinking, this dumbass isn't actually going to block me in. Or is he?

Five minutes later I was out the door. My Jeep was parked at the far end of my driveway. Sure enough, Dumbass parked 1/3 over my exit. Maybe I have room to squeeze past him if I run over my planting area. The guy was pulling a hose from the truck and I pointed at him, made eye contact. Then I pointed to his truck, and gave him an incredulous look, like "really, dude?".

He said "you should have enough room to get by."

I said "Move the truck."

He said "I needed to get the hose out and it was easier..."

"Move the truck! You need to be aware of your surroundings. Spatial relations."

"OK sir I'll move it right away."

"MOVE THE GODDAMN TRUCK."

The fucker moved pretty fast after that....