A Little Humor, A Little Faith

**jollie** · 02-07-2008, 01:47 PM

God, and his freind "Chugs", a young dude with a goatee, a backward baseball cap, and holes in the knees of his jeans, are arm-wrestling. It's a close match, until God farts, and starts waving the smell towards Chugs. Chugs says "Whoa, man, that's RANK!" And with that distraction, God pushes Chugs' arm down and wins the match. God stands, raises both fists, and says, "Yes! Undefeated!" Then he says to Chugs, "Oh, wait! Here comes another one! Quick, gimme your lighter!" God takes Chugs' lighter, bends over, lights it behind himself, and farts. After the huge blast and flame die down, the Galaxies Quasars, Stars, and Planets start to cool, and slowly turn, and Space-Time begins.

No, it's not blasphemy, and it's just as good as any Athiest Scientist's guess about the Big Bang. Not ONE of you Liberals can go out in the woods where it's REALLY dark, look up on a clear night, with or without a telescope, at the emotion-inducing beauty of the stars and planets, and not WONDER about God, the beginning of Space-Time. What is there AFTER the edge of the Universe? Or is the Universe infinite. Infinite. Now THERE'S a word. Can the Human Mind even CONCIEVE it, let alone UNDERSTAND it? What was there BEFORE the "Big Bang"? How can a supposed "athiest", who has NO belief in a Supreme Being, be HONEST with himself, and others, and say that he does not WONDER how these questions can be answered with NO belief in a Supreme Being.

Do any of you know cosmology, astronomy? Do you know what your body is MADE of? Star stuff. That's right. In the universe, the elements are divided about 95% Hydrogen, 2% Helium, and 3% ALL THE OTHER HUNDREDS OF ELEMENTS.
Do you know how the Universe MAKES life-giving Oxygen, the Carbon that EVERY living thing on Earth is mostly made of, or the Iron that becomes Steel, with Carbon and other alloys, that makes your automobile, and every TOOL Mankind uses to build the Earth we have made?

The Universe MAKES the Periodic Table(except for a few man-made radioactive elements like the Technitium that they shot into my veins to look at my heart last week), or I guess GOD makes the Periodic Table, by BLOWING UP STARS! When a star goes super-nova, it swells to hundreds of times its normal size, then compresses to a much smaller-than-normal size, but it RETAINS the same MASS, which means it has the same GRAVITY. This means the Hydrogen and Helium, which only have 1 or 2 protons and electrons, are compressed so greatly, they do a little "Physics magic", and turn into elements with SIX protons and electrons(Carbon), and 26 protons(Iron) 79 protons(Gold) and 92(Uranium). All these elements are formed when stars die, including the one that make up our bodies. So WE are made of Star-Stuff.

And Billions of years ago, some stars died, their elements floated around, our star, the Sun, was born, and some of these elements floated down to Earth. Scientists will tell you this random, one-in-10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 ,000 chance that just the exact chemicals, in just the exact proportions (multiply that big number by itself for even MORE incredible odds) combined in a tidal pool where a LIGHTNING BOLT turned it into LIFE. That's how scientists try to explain away God. No that's incorrect. That's how scientists try to explain away God's creation of LIFE. It says NOTHING about the Universe, and all its OTHER WONDERS. Still don't believe? I can't help you.

**jollie** · 02-07-2008, 01:52 PM

"including the one that make up our bodies" is a typo. There are hundreds of elements that make up our bodies. Just look on the back of a vitamin jar.