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Thread: #BidenDebateLines on Twitter... Funny Stiff!

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    Default #BidenDebateLines on Twitter... Funny Stiff!

    "I'm not the baffoon people say I am... I actually have no monkeys in my family."

    "You told me there'd be cake and strippers."

    "Hey Paul, do you mind if I move my podium closer so I can copy off of you?"

    "I'd like to phone a friend."

    "Mr Ryan, you keep wasting time on govnmt debt. The American people want to know how much stuff they can have."

    "My buzzer is broken."

    "How can we be "broke" when we can print all the money we want, Mr. Smart Guy? (pause) My socks hurt."

    "Economics... could you use that in a sentence please?"

    "Can I buy a vowel?"

    "Can I get a 'do over' on that last question?"

    "I support HIV and won't rest until it is funded for Everyone!"

    No words, just visualize Paul Ryan with a laser pointer and Biden running around the stage trying to catch the red dot.

    "First thing we did, we were on the phone calling Jon Corzine. Literally. Literally."

    "That Paul Ryan, he's always all about the facts. ppfftt. Facts aren't going to put gas in the car, Buddy!"

    "No Vice President in the history of the United States has come as close as I have to catching a leprechaun."

    "...and that's why the second time I got my head stuck in the banister was one of the greatest challenges I've overcome."

    "Have you been to a 7-Eleven lately? I swear you can't..." *tackled by handlers*

    "You know that guy who wrote the Constitution, you know ... George Jefferson ..."

    "You're from Wisconsin? Riiiiiiight, like that's even a real country."

    "I know you're from Wisconsin, but I can understand your accent just fine. At least you're not that Indian guy."

    "Paul Ryan is from Wisconsin. I mean really that's almost in Canada, folks"

    "When Obama and I were killing bin Ladin, we didn't have time to propose a budget!"

    "Is this almost over? I heard there were Spaghetti-Os in the break room."

    "I would like to recognize some people here tonite. Christopher Reeves, stand up!"

    "Folks, I have no idea what all those Ryan numbers mean, but I can tell you they probably would work"

    "Folks, Barack is Black"

    "Look folks, trust me, I've personally tested Barack's mettle & it's got legs."

    "If you live in a ghetto, you didn't get there on your own, Government made that happen!"

    "The GOP outsourced every job we ever created!"

    "My buddy Obama said I don't have to talk issues, so let's talk about Reid's latest gossip".

    "Well, once we present our budget plan you will note that 'red' is the new 'black'."

    "Founding Fathers... Psh. Who ever liked their parents anyways."

    "To imply Fast and Furious is anything more than a bad movie is fundamentally racist."

    "What the hell's wrong with Amtrak?"

    "WHAT!?!?! Napolitano is a Woman!?!?"

    "Did I mention that Barack is bright and clean?"

    You know, when you walk into a 7-11... Oh wait I used that one already.

    "Do these idiots know we left Iraq EXACTLY when Bush had signed the agreement to leave? OOPS. Did I say that out loud?"

    "Thank GOD we divided up Iraq into 3 separate countries like I suggested."

    "No, seriously, man, how do you know when sour cream goes bad?"

    "People, all you have to do is properly inflate your tires!"

    "Oh, do I have to answer questions too? But I'm already vice president. I think. Right?"

    "We're not here to talk about the past 4 years and what will happen in the next 4. What's that? We are here for that? Oh."

    "No1 said we'd discuss budgets,economics. Math is hard!!"MSM moderator:"Agree.Mr. Ryan, refrain fr economics."

    "I thought questions would require a 'yes' or 'no' response." MSM moderator, "Our mistake. Apologies, Mr. Vice President."

    "It's unfair I have to debate someone smarter than me. I demand simplier questions!!" MSM Moderator "Agreed, Mr. VP."

    "I've got more plugs for Obama tonight than I got plugs on my head."

    "Lincoln would have crossed the Delaware too but he had no health insurance!"

    "All this talk about immigration is making me hungry for tacos!"

    "Axelrod really wanted me to do this on teleprompter -- but I told him I'm much better when I wing it!"

    "EXCUSE ME SIR, we DID NOT give amnesty to illegal aliens! We merely said they don't have to leave if they don't want to!"

    "Damn, and I learned all that spanish preparing for Rubio for nothing. No me gusta."

    "My great, great, grandfather saw the Gettysburg Address on T.V. and was a member of the Lincoln Fan Club!"

    "You can't walk into a Taco Bell without knowing some Spanish!"

    https://twitter.com/#!/search/?q=%23...Lines&src=hash
    Last edited by Dixie - In Memoriam; 08-12-2012 at 11:18 AM.

  2. The Following User Says Thank You to Dixie - In Memoriam For This Post:

    Supposn (08-17-2012)

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    Did no one else find this as hilarious as I did?

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    No. I only read the first couple though. It's kinda stupid because Biden is a great debator. He doesn't get the credit for it, but he pretty much took Rudy out of the running with his "9/11, a verb and a noun" line. And he absolutely earned my admiration when he debated Palin. A fucking moron. Really a borderline retard. But if he had ever let that on even once, he would have been crucified for being sexist. He walked a line there, and he just doesn't get the credit for what he did. But some of us noticed.

    I'm not the slightest bit worried about Joe Biden's debate.
    DARLA: The Internet's Leading Cause of White Dude Butthurt 12 Years and Counting

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    I thought we were supposed to cry.....sorry.....

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    I'll bet when Dicksee gets a hard-on, his wife calls it a funny little stiff!

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    I'm having trouble deciding whether to add Howard to my small list of people to ignore......if anyone can point to a post of his worth reading I would appreciate it, since I've been having trouble finding any.....

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    Yeah, "stiff" was supposed to be "stuff" but when talking about Biden, either works.

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    Quote Originally Posted by PostmodernProphet View Post
    I'm having trouble deciding whether to add Howard to my small list of people to ignore......if anyone can point to a post of his worth reading I would appreciate it, since I've been having trouble finding any.....
    I keep Howdy on ignore, just so I can unclutter threads a bit and read the good stuff. It confounds him that I will sometimes respond to his posts, even though he is on ignore.

    There are no posts by Howdy worth reading, but they can be of great entertainment value when bored.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Darla View Post
    No. I only read the first couple though. It's kinda stupid because Biden is a great debator. He doesn't get the credit for it, but he pretty much took Rudy out of the running with his "9/11, a verb and a noun" line. And he absolutely earned my admiration when he debated Palin. A fucking moron. Really a borderline retard. But if he had ever let that on even once, he would have been crucified for being sexist. He walked a line there, and he just doesn't get the credit for what he did. But some of us noticed.

    I'm not the slightest bit worried about Joe Biden's debate.
    LMAO... high praise indeed... 'he beat Palin in a debate, I am not worried'... ROFLMAO
    Quote from Cypress:
    "Scientists don't use "averages". Maybe armchair supertools on message boards ascribe some meaning to "averages" between two random data points. And maybe clueless amatuers "draw a straight line" through two random end data points to define a "trend". Experts don't.

    They use mean annual and five year means in trend analysis. Don't tell me I have to explain the difference to you. "

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    Quote Originally Posted by Superfreak View Post
    LMAO... high praise indeed... 'he beat Palin in a debate, I am not worried'... ROFLMAO
    What I said was he didn't let on that she was a moron and borderline retard. Which was something you were sitting there waiting for so you could scream "sexism!!" And you were greatly disappointed when you didn't get your soundbite. It's not easy to debate a retard and not let on that you know she's a retard. That was actually a very difficult job he had and you were dying for him to make one little misstep.
    DARLA: The Internet's Leading Cause of White Dude Butthurt 12 Years and Counting

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    Quote Originally Posted by Darla View Post
    What I said was he didn't let on that she was a moron and borderline retard. Which was something you were sitting there waiting for so you could scream "sexism!!" And you were greatly disappointed when you didn't get your soundbite. It's not easy to debate a retard and not let on that you know she's a retard. That was actually a very difficult job he had and you were dying for him to make one little misstep.
    It's funny that most on the right believed she at least held her own against Biden, if not won it outright. She certainly wasn't 'embarrassed' by the brilliance of Joe Biden. (doesn't say much for Biden if she is a borderline retard.) One thing that DID happen in that debate, Joe set some sort of record for most number of blatant lies told in a debate, and was never really called out on them by Palin. I chalk it up to Palin being a political lightweight and not understanding she needed to do that... Ryan won't make that mistake.

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    Default Joe Bidden

    Quote Originally Posted by Dixie View Post
    Did no one else find this as hilarious as I did?
    Dixie, I’m with you on this. Even at his most nonsensical moments Bidden delivers more truth an insight than any other major political player.

    It would an additional Obama error to even consider replacing him on the ticket. Everyone he displeases is already committed to voting for Romney. He more or less delights everyone else.

    Obama should, (as I believe Bidden does) take satisfaction by at best he succeeds to discomfort those who lie to misrepresent his political positions. Bidden certainly pleases me.

    Respectfully, Supposn

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