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Thread: Another warning to the Conservative Republican Christians About Halloween

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    Default Another warning to the Conservative Republican Christians About Halloween













    Leftism/Liberalism is a mental disorder and must be stopped. Warn and teach the children.

    To be continued...

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    Tips for good christians on Halloween


    1. Wait for unsaved children to come to your door and hurl a bucket full of warm lamb's blood (goat or dog blood can be substituted later in the night if you run out) all over their hair and faces. Shout - "I plead the power of the Blood of the Perfect Lamb over you! Take that! FOUL DEMON!"

    2. Dress up as the freshly resurrected Christ. To make your costume as realistic as possible: (a) use your mother's sewing needles to poke holes in your hands and stomach; (b) wear bluish makeup to look like someone who has been dead and lying around in a cave for a couple of days; and (c) stuff five pounds of week-old hamburger meat in your pockets to smell like rotting flesh. Sneak up behind people, grab them, turn them around, look them in they eyes and scream, "Why have you forsaken me!" And then slap them very hard across the face with a palm-full of rancid hamburger meat. It will usually scare the living Hell out of little children, and they are sure to remember their first experience with Jesus for the rest of their pathetic lives.

    3. Offer to exchange your giant treat bag with the small bag of an unsaved child - when he gets home, surprise! BIBLES!
    “If we have to have a choice between being dead and pitied, and being alive with a bad image, we’d rather be alive and have the bad image.”

    — Golda Meir

    Zionism is the movement for the self-determination and statehood for the Jewish people in their ancestral homeland, the land of Israel.







    ברוך השם

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    Quote Originally Posted by guno View Post
    Tips for good christians on Halloween


    1. Wait for unsaved children to come to your door and hurl a bucket full of warm lamb's blood (goat or dog blood can be substituted later in the night if you run out) all over their hair and faces. Shout - "I plead the power of the Blood of the Perfect Lamb over you! Take that! FOUL DEMON!"

    2. Dress up as the freshly resurrected Christ. To make your costume as realistic as possible: (a) use your mother's sewing needles to poke holes in your hands and stomach; (b) wear bluish makeup to look like someone who has been dead and lying around in a cave for a couple of days; and (c) stuff five pounds of week-old hamburger meat in your pockets to smell like rotting flesh. Sneak up behind people, grab them, turn them around, look them in they eyes and scream, "Why have you forsaken me!" And then slap them very hard across the face with a palm-full of rancid hamburger meat. It will usually scare the living Hell out of little children, and they are sure to remember their first experience with Jesus for the rest of their pathetic lives.

    3. Offer to exchange your giant treat bag with the small bag of an unsaved child - when he gets home, surprise! BIBLES!
    Okay. I admit to laughing out loud. I'll try to remember to say some Hail Marys tomorrow.
    "Conservatism is the blind and fear-filled worship of dead radicals." -- Mark Twain

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    ^I take it back, guno IS 'tarded.

    As a rebuttal:

    Give the trick-or-treaters gefilte fish and matzoh.



    guno is a tard.

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    I don't think 'Christians' honor Halloween.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack View Post
    I don't think 'Christians' honor Halloween.
    We dont anymore. Wife wont have anything to do with it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Stone View Post
    We dont anymore. Wife wont have anything to do with it.

    Yeah. Instead of a fun Holiday for kids, it's turned into a 'Political' issue. (A Day for Satan-Worshippers)

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack View Post
    I don't think 'Christians' honor Halloween.
    It was my mom’s favorite “holiday.” There was no more Christian lady than she was.

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    Quote Originally Posted by leaningright View Post
    It was my mom’s favorite “holiday.” There was no more Christian lady than she was.
    No more 'fun'.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack View Post
    No more 'fun'.
    We’ll, our porch is decorated and I’ll have the mid-size snickers bought and the popcorn balls made for the kiddos by the 31st. We’ll have fun anyway.

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    Quote Originally Posted by leaningright View Post
    We’ll, our porch is decorated and I’ll have the mid-size snickers bought and the popcorn balls made for the kiddos by the 31st. We’ll have fun anyway.



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    Quote Originally Posted by guno View Post
    Tips for good christians on Halloween

    1. Wait for unsaved children to come to your door and hurl a bucket full of warm lamb's blood (goat or dog blood can be substituted later in the night if you run out) all over their hair and faces. Shout - "I plead the power of the Blood of the Perfect Lamb over you! Take that! FOUL DEMON!"
    A Christian performing an old Jewish rite???
    Quote Originally Posted by guno View Post
    2. Dress up as the freshly resurrected Christ. To make your costume as realistic as possible: (a) use your mother's sewing needles to poke holes in your hands and stomach; (b) wear bluish makeup to look like someone who has been dead and lying around in a cave for a couple of days; and (c) stuff five pounds of week-old hamburger meat in your pockets to smell like rotting flesh. Sneak up behind people, grab them, turn them around, look them in they eyes and scream, "Why have you forsaken me!" And then slap them very hard across the face with a palm-full of rancid hamburger meat. It will usually scare the living Hell out of little children, and they are sure to remember their first experience with Jesus for the rest of their pathetic lives.
    What makes you think a resurrected body is rotting??
    Quote Originally Posted by guno View Post
    3. Offer to exchange your giant treat bag with the small bag of an unsaved child - when he gets home, surprise! BIBLES!
    Play the trick on that house. They earned it.
    "The atmosphere is among the factors that determines the Earth's atmosphere." --ZenMode
    "Donald has failed in almost every endeavor he has attempted. " --floridafan
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack View Post
    I don't think 'Christians' honor Halloween.
    Why?
    "The atmosphere is among the factors that determines the Earth's atmosphere." --ZenMode
    "Donald has failed in almost every endeavor he has attempted. " --floridafan
    "Abortion is not a moral issue. " --BidenPresident
    "Propaganda can also be factual." --Flash
    "Even after being vaccinated, you shed virus particles." --Jerome
    "no slavery is forcing another into labor" -archives
    "Evs are much safer from fires" -- Nordberg
    "Abortion has killed no one." -- LurchAddams

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    Quote Originally Posted by Stone View Post
    We dont anymore. Wife wont have anything to do with it.
    No kids in the neighborhood?
    "The atmosphere is among the factors that determines the Earth's atmosphere." --ZenMode
    "Donald has failed in almost every endeavor he has attempted. " --floridafan
    "Abortion is not a moral issue. " --BidenPresident
    "Propaganda can also be factual." --Flash
    "Even after being vaccinated, you shed virus particles." --Jerome
    "no slavery is forcing another into labor" -archives
    "Evs are much safer from fires" -- Nordberg
    "Abortion has killed no one." -- LurchAddams

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack View Post
    Yeah. Instead of a fun Holiday for kids, it's turned into a 'Political' issue. (A Day for Satan-Worshippers)
    Some have turned it into a religious issue. Moron fundamentalists, mostly. Yup. Christianity has it's fundamentalists, just like any religion.
    "The atmosphere is among the factors that determines the Earth's atmosphere." --ZenMode
    "Donald has failed in almost every endeavor he has attempted. " --floridafan
    "Abortion is not a moral issue. " --BidenPresident
    "Propaganda can also be factual." --Flash
    "Even after being vaccinated, you shed virus particles." --Jerome
    "no slavery is forcing another into labor" -archives
    "Evs are much safer from fires" -- Nordberg
    "Abortion has killed no one." -- LurchAddams

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