USF. If all you're going to do is Robocall me, I'll be forced to ignore you.
But ... Good News!
Ol' Jack has your back on this one ... AND ... your twin sister Kellyanne LOVES it.
Alright, your 'Greenhouse in the Desert' idea was a dismal failure, but it's not how many times you get knocked down, it's how many times you get back up. Right?
So ... here's the Pitch:
"3 day Course on Snitching, Ratting, and being an Informant. Held at the Motel 6 in Gila Bend. A usual $29.95 course fee, knocked down to $19.95 to the first 100 Applicants"
Then you're going to have to fill in some stuff about the Virtues of the People that snitched out the 'Infidels' in the Spanish Inquisition, the Good Qualities of the People who ratted out the 'Traitors' of the Third Reich, and the Heroes of the HUAC Investigations who fingered the 'Communists' of Hollywood who where blackballed from working.
Now, here's where the money comes in. You GIVE them the Patch ('US Junior Deputy Air Marshall of the Internet') but they have to BUY the small uniform jacket for $100 (made at your own factory sweatshop of illegal migrants at $6.15 a pop). Then, when you start reeling the money in, you come with another Offer of 'matching hat' with 'Make the Internet Safe Again' for a measly $25, ... or two for 'Only 50 bucks'.
You can Thank me later for this one, USF.
Bookmarks