Australian Football

[Diuretic]

It doesn't matter if it's the slick Australian Football League (bred for TV) brand or the rough as guts country (rural) footy league, it's exactly the same. True, the coach's three-quarter time speech may be different (half time is in the rooms, three-quarter time bollockings are out on the field). This coach in a rural Victorian (one of our states) footy game told it like it is.

If you're at work don't click on it. If you have kids around, don't click on it. This is a language warning. The average US Senator would faint if they heard this :clink:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ygXKQo3MdBc"

[Epicurus]

Manchester United ftw!

[Diuretic]

Manchester United ftw!

And Chelski were playing at home :)

The bloke in the clip is better at effing and blinding than Harry Redknapp :eek:

[charver]

I liked it when he was reminiscing about the Olympics "sometime in the f****n' 80's with some f****n' chick doing a f****n' marathon where she came f****n' 10th or 20th or something but that's not f****n' important"

:D

[evince]

football in all its forms is the devils work

[Topspin]

your husband should divorce you for that statement alone. LOL

[Diuretic]

I liked it when he was reminiscing about the Olympics "sometime in the f****n' 80's with some f****n' chick doing a f****n' marathon where she came f****n' 10th or 20th or something but that's not f****n' important"

:D

Poetic, sorry, I mean effing poetical :clink:

[Diuretic]

football in all its forms is the devils work

Damn.

I'm gonna call in an air strike :)

Not really. Just, well, I'm sort of, well, um, er, I mean, football....it's sort of.. well, a bloke thing and...um...take away our footy balls and...really....um...oh I dunno...I suppose dominoes is good...sort of.....or Scrabble...I mean...it's only for a couple of hours, it's not that harmful.....is it the beer that's the problem? :eek:

[Damocles]

football in all its forms is the devils work
LOL. Waterboy!

[Minister of Truth]

Are we talking real football here, or what we Americans ignorantly call "soccer?"

[Diuretic]

Are we talking real football here, or what we Americans ignorantly call "soccer?"

Yep, real football. http://www.afl.com.au/

[FUCK THE POLICE]

LOL. Waterboy!

Not sure I get it.

[Diuretic]

Not sure I get it.

Wasn't it a film?

It's all to subtle for me. I'm out of my depth here.

[Damocles]

Wasn't it a film?

It's all to subtle for me. I'm out of my depth here.
It was a film about footsbawl.... His moms was always saying, "Footsbawl is of de debil.."

[Diuretic]

It was a film about footsbawl.... His moms was always saying, "Footsbawl is of de debil.."

Ah yes! The Cajun lady! I remember it now! The swamp and eating alligators and the rest of it. And some sheila the bloke was trying to impress. He was a real dill and she sort of cottoned onto him for some reason. That's the one isn't it?

[Damocles]

Ah yes! The Cajun lady! I remember it now! The swamp and eating alligators and the rest of it. And some sheila the bloke was trying to impress. He was a real dill and she sort of cottoned onto him for some reason. That's the one isn't it?
'Tis!

[Diuretic]

'Tis!

My Green Card is in the post!

[FUCK THE POLICE]

It was a film about footsbawl.... His moms was always saying, "Footsbawl is of de debil.."

I have serious ADHD.

[Minister of Truth]

Waterboy came out the summer I started playing 8th grade football, so it made for a lot of team humor. For instance, you couldn't set down the container of waterbottles without saying "high quality, H20!" :cool:

[Crashk]

I LOVE FOOTIE!

Been a fan ever since I caught it on cable maybe 20 yrs ago.
Derrick Clapper was the big player with the Swans then.

There's a sports bar down the street that occasionally shows the games. I've been there when gangs of Aussie fans were there. I always have a great time with them, mostly trying to figure out what the hell their talking about. Strange accent you know, but its a great game

[Mott the Hoople]

football in all its forms is the devils work
Desh, next you'll be saying something scary like, "Beer is the devils brew" and then we will have to burn you alive for being a witch.

[Mott the Hoople]

your husband should divorce you for that statement alone. LOL

It would not only be grounds for divorce in Ohio but also excommunication!!

[Mott the Hoople]

My Green Card is in the post!

I duno, to get a green card you have to answer yes to the following.

Has your porch ever collapsed and killed 3 dogs?

Have you ever gone to a family reunion to pick up chicks?

Do you have at least one car on your lawn on blocks? (drive way doesn't count).

Have you ever said "Honest Your Honor, I was only helping that sheep over the fence."?

If you can answer "yes" to questions like these, you're well on your way to earning a green card.

[Diuretic]

I duno, to get a green card you have to answer yes to the following.

Has your porch ever collapsed and killed 3 dogs?

Have you ever gone to a family reunion to pick up chicks?

Do you have at least one car on your lawn on blocks? (drive way doesn't count).

Have you ever said "Honest Your Honor, I was only helping that sheep over the fence."?

If you can answer "yes" to questions like these, you're well on your way to earning a green card.

But....I wanted to live in Boston........:eek:

And the sheep thing - well, everyone knows sheep are such bloody liars...:clink:

[Damocles]

But....I wanted to live in Boston........:eek:

And the sheep thing - well, everyone knows sheep are such bloody liars...:clink:
I was told you picked the ugly sheep.

[Mott the Hoople]

I was told you picked the ugly sheep.


Well you have to be carefull fooling around with the cute ones. That's what got me in trouble when I was in Arkansas!!:eek:

[Diuretic]

I was told you picked the ugly sheep.

Yeah well I'm a bit slow, I usually get the ugly ones, but long as you keep your eyes closed it's okay.

[Diuretic]

Well you have to be carefull fooling around with the cute ones. That's what got me in trouble when I was in Arkansas!!:eek:

Yeah, the cute ones will always blab - tarts :)

[Mott the Hoople]

Yeah, the cute ones will always blab - tarts :)


Yea they do....and it can put you on the spot too. When the prosecutor told the Judge that I had been caught fornicating with sheep he said to me....

"That's sick, that's disgusting....aren't you ashamed of yourself?"

I said......

NaAaaaa

[Diuretic]

:D

Of course there's always the Embraceable Ewes :D (the Rams should have kept that name for them....but I suppose New Zealand objected :cof1:)

[Mott the Hoople]

:D

Of course there's always the Embraceable Ewes :D (the Rams should have kept that name for them....but I suppose New Zealand objected :cof1:)

An Ozzie friend of mine was telling me how he was hiking around the back 40 while on holiday in New Zealand when he comes across a Kiwi going hammer and tongs at it with a sheep.

He said it was the most disgusting thing he ever saw in his life so he shouted at the Kiwi. "Oi Mate, where I come from we sheer them first!"

[Diuretic]

An Ozzie friend of mine was telling me how he was hiking around the back 40 while on holiday in New Zealand when he comes across a Kiwi going hammer and tongs at it with a sheep.

He said it was the most disgusting thing he ever saw in his life so he shouted at the Kiwi. "Oi Mate, where I come from we sheer them first!"

lolololol - now you know why we crutch our sheep :clink:

[Mott the Hoople]

lolololol - now you know why we crutch our sheep :clink:
A bit different attitude here in the states. In Montana some cattle ranchers hired some thugs to kill a sheep rancher who was using the open range. The cattle ranchers were aquited on the unique legal principle that the sheep rancher was better off dead.

[Diuretic]

A bit different attitude here in the states. In Montana some cattle ranchers hired some thugs to kill a sheep rancher who was using the open range. The cattle ranchers were aquited on the unique legal principle that the sheep rancher was better off dead.

Ouch, unfriendly local jurors no doubt!

[Mott the Hoople]

Ouch, unfriendly local jurors no doubt!

That happened a long time ago. Cattle ranchers hated sheep ranchers for the damage they did to the grazing lands so they took some frontier justice into their own hands.

[Diuretic]

That happened a long time ago. Cattle ranchers hated sheep ranchers for the damage they did to the grazing lands so they took some frontier justice into their own hands.

Hang on, I've been to North Dakota, sheep didn't do that damage :eek:

I've been to Montana too (only a small part of it), I would think it could handle a few sheep. I mean, they're smaller than beeves (I read that in a cowboy comic years ago, I still like to use it when possible) so they'd do less damage.

I swear I'm not a member of the Ovine Liberation Front.

Really.